I make simple poems

I make poems, once in a while....


Monstrous

What if I were a bird
will you doubt my nature
fleeting long distance
whenever I have the chance?

What if I were a bird
liberally wild and free
will you give me freedom
to fly so high from dusk till dawn
across land and sea
till my heart is skinned
and head is whirled
of which my return is always a mystery?

Will you imprison me
lock me up inside this cold, empty confinement
Bind me near to you
Tie me close to your heart
make me feel its every beat
embrace me,
till my vertebrate breaks
for it was your way
of showing how much you love me?

But you cannot choose, can you?
Because neither is sweet nor bearable.
because you so loved me
that making me happy is all that you want to see
yet can never let me free, you never let me free.
You fear, I might forget.
Oh yes, it was fear ever since.
Fear that you might lose me
you who have tamed me.

But have you given a thought
that one day I might find a way
to break these chains, to flee away?
I never wanted to hurt you from the beginning,
but I had to.
I had to before I die with your own potion

I cared about you, believe me
From a distance I look back
And remember the two of us
The passage that leads to your door.

But the door leads to a room full of hate.
The door was shut for the longest time
It was dark and empty
It gives me an eerie sight of you
You became the ghost
that hunts me in my dreams
I longed for that fateful morning
For someone to come and save me

I wanted to help you
Believe me.
But how will I when you took my life from me?
You molded me according to you
It was a forceful act
I never liked it.
All of me now
Was a shadow of you.

You hurt me
Again and again
I bleed
Again and again
You shook me to the ends of the world.

That fateful day came
When you wanted more than you wished for
You destroyed my wings. Finally.
You lied when you said it was love
It was revenge than love, I know.
I could no longer fly
I was numb I could not breathe.

I remember shouting over and over
as hard as I could
No angel could save me from you.
No one came.

I wanted to look in the mirror
To see if my reflections were the same
But I was afraid what to find out
I know I was never the same.
From a young and beautiful bird
To a scary and monstrous creature
It terrifies me
It gives me tremor
As the days go by.

Who could still love
a bird
With nothing but scars?
A monster.
My own company.
The monster you have created
was me.